PoliticsVerdict: Satire
Mayor Announces Plan to Fix Potholes by Renaming Them
City officials say "urban texture features" test better with tourists.
Infrastructure Week, Kind Of
The mayor unveiled a $2.3 million initiative Monday to rebrand the city's 14,000 potholes as "urban texture features."
The plan includes new signage, a downloadable map, and a walking tour.
"We're not filling them," the mayor clarified. "We're contextualizing them."
Residents reported that their tires remain unimpressed by the contextualization.
More Politics
PoliticsVerdict: Satire
Congress Passes Bill Nobody Read, Including the Bill
In a rare show of bipartisanship, 100 senators agreed that reading is for the judiciary branch.
Marla Fenwick · Aug 8, 2026